Scores (KENNETH)

 
A note on our scoring system

We individually award "Police Shields" out of 100 to each book, as the token of our estimation of the story's value in the 87th Precinct canon. The scores are then input into our great computer (see below) and the result is returned, rounded down (we are against conventional maths here at Hark!) and recorded on this website. 

Problems with the system

We're re-reading the entire 87th Precinct series, sequentially, including for some of us books we've not read before. Therefore we're trying to make judgements on not only the individual stories themselves, but also where they sit in the whole run of books and other aspects of ascribed 'importance', which we discuss in the episode. There is never a definitive answer and a score of 50 for an 87th Precinct book would probably be a score of 90 for other things! We're pretty sure there's no such thing as a bad 87th Precinct story, but time will tell...

Who or what is K.E.N.N.E.T.H?

"Kalculates Every Number Nearly Every Time [Honestly]", or K.E.N.N.E.T.H., is the computational engine responsible for storing and tracking the results of our rankings of each of the books. 

K.E.N.N.E.T.H. is usually found calculating the scores awarded to each pub on the Great North Beer Run (an annual railway-based booze trip) for such features as BSB (Bar Staff Banter) and Fixtures and Fittings. During his down-time he has been re-purposed to meet our needs and the old boy is doing great.

SPIN-OFFS

Whilst K.E.N.N.E.T.H. is not the primary computer used when calculating the 'honorary' scores for the various spin-offs we've looked at, he is used to hold the data once calculated. The results are below. For Star Trek we awarded results in 'Starfleet Communicator Badges', High and Low was simple Police Badges and Inkaar was given in units of Indian CID Police Warrant Cards. The Young Savages has been measured in Switchblades. The Birds utilised a measure based on 'Splodges of Guano on a Police Sheriff's Car'. The 87th Precinct TV episode Line Of Duty has been rated in terms of 'Crochet Beads'. We've decided to rate Danger: Dinosaurs! in terms of 'Dinosaur Scales'. The movie of Fuzz has been graded in terms of number of 'Annoying Painters'. For Rocket To Luna, the chosen unit was 'Fuel Cells'. When we returned to space for the TV story Appointment on Mars you'd have thought we'd pick something futuristic, but instead we've opted for 'Carpet Weave Density' and for Find The Feathered Serpent the unit is 'Maize Seeds'.

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